-Thank God our parents paid that night. Restaurant bills and large groups of people. Let’s all just say it in unison now, "I only have a 20." Fucking great. Figures. And half of the people have the nerve to say that as if it’s someone else’s problem. It’s almost as if they’re saying "Well I only have a 20, so let me put it back in my wallet and you guys can pay for me." Oh no you didn’t, girlfriend. Seriously though, my girlfriend, don’t put your money away because in this relationship we go halfsies...you pigeon. Point is, going out to eat with friends can be such a great, relaxing, delicious time until the bill comes. The only solution is to bring your one mathematically-inclined nerd friend, Ryan, to dinner and shove him the bill and all your 20s saying, "You like math, you get the change and figure it out." I mean moments like these were made for math majors, while strippers were made for us language majors.